I want to talk to you today about knowing you are loved. When Victoria and I had been dating for about 9 months, a friend of mine called me secretly. She said, “Joel, I just talked to Victoria. Don’t tell her that I called, but she told me she thinks she loves you”.
My friend was so excited, she was waiting for me to join in the excitement, but I had a problem with two words, “She thinks”. If she thinks she loves me, that means maybe she does, maybe she doesn’t. She’s still trying to figure it out. It could go either way. She thinks didn’t give me any confidence at all. In fact, it made me think, “I need to perform better. I need to do more, try to impress, be good enough”. She thinks put me under more pressure.
The problem with this approach is when we make mistakes, we get off course, we don’t perform perfectly, we think God goes and finds somebody else to love. After all, if you don’t love me, human nature says I’m not going to love you back. But God is not like people. People can love you conditionally. If you do right, perform right, treat me right, then I’ll love you. But if you let me down, I’ll go find somebody else.
When we make mistakes, God doesn’t change his mind. You can run away from God, instead of turning the other way, God will come running towards you. Quit trying to earn this love. There’s nothing you can do to make God love you any more or any less. It’s a gift. Just receive it by faith. Sometimes we’re trying to clean ourselves up, get good enough, then we’ll believe God really loves us, but take the pressure off. God loves you right now. He loved you when you were wrong, he loved you when you were off course. Paul said nothing can separate us from the love of God. You are a marked man, a marked woman.
Before you were formed in your mother’s womb, God knew you. He took time to plan out all of your days. He knows your thoughts before you think them. He knows your words before you speak them. Jesus said the hair on your head are all numbered. Now, I love Victoria, but I have never taken time to number her hairs. Number doesn’t mean there are 54,623, that’s counting. Numbered means this is hair number 21,238. Every time you take a shower, every time we lose a hair, God has to renumber.
There was a popular book turned into a movie a few years ago, it was called, “He’s just not that into you”. It was about guys not really liking a girl. Can I tell you God is just the opposite? He’s way into you. If he’s taking the time to number your hairs, to know your thoughts, to plan out all of your days, do you really think there’s anything you can do to cause him to stop loving you? But how God must feel when we go around thinking, “I think he loves me. I think I’m good enough. I think I haven’t done too much wrong”. Get rid of the “I think” mentality and start having an “I know” mentality. It’s very freeing when you can say, “I know God loves me. I know I’m the apple of his eye. I know he’s smiling down on me”.
Voices will whisper, “Not you. You’ve made mistakes. You lost your temper. You’re not religious enough”. God doesn’t love you because you’re religious, or good enough, or come from a certain family. He loves you because you are his child. He breathed his life into you. When you receive this love, you’ll live with a confidence. When you go from I think to I know, you’ll quit trying to earn it, quit trying to be good enough. You’ll live secure, knowing that your Heavenly Father loves you.
Can you imagine if they would’ve read John’s account? They would’ve thought, “Who does John think he is, describing himself as the one Jesus loved? Jesus loved us all. The nerve of that guy”. But John had an incredible confidence not just in how much he loved God, but in how much God loved him. Four times he referred to himself as the disciple whom Jesus loved. You would think, “All right, John, we got it the first time. We heard you loud and clear. You think you’re the one he loves, you don’t have to keep telling us”. But in chapter 19, he wrote again, “When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom Jesus loved”.
Now, you know Jesus loved his mother. In fact, he probably loved his mother more than he loved John. But John didn’t take the time to tell us how much he loved his mother, he just reiterated the fact he was the one Jesus loved. Now, you can fault him for it, but I have to give him credit. He knew how much he was loved.
Two chapters later, John wrote, “The disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter”. It’s funny, he didn’t say, “The disciple whom Jesus loved said to the other disciple whom Jesus loved”. You could take this as being arrogant, self-centered, but John was showing us the confidence he had in how much he knew God loved him, and when you can do like John, maybe not announce it to everybody, don’t put it on your business card, but in your heart, “I’m the one that he loves”. You wake up in the morning, “Good morning, Lord, it’s the one that you love”. All through the day, “Lord, I love you, and I know I’m the one you love”.
They didn’t tell Jesus how much Lazarus loved him. They thought it would be more persuasive, more effective to remind Jesus how much he loved Lazarus, and sometimes, we’re trying to convince God that we love him, “God, I went to church last week. God, I bit my tongue at the office when I felt like telling them off. God, I’ve been performing perfectly, would you please help me”? Why don’t you do like Mary and Martha, and say, “Lord, the one you love needs healing. The one you love is lonely. The one you love has a child that’s off course”.
What moves God is not just your love for him, but recognizing his love for you. It pleases God when you know you are dearly loved. That’s why the scripture says, “Come boldly to the throne. Don’t go like a weak worm of the dust”.
If my son came up to me half embarrassed, ashamed, head down, “Dad, I hate to bother you. I know you’re busy. I don’t deserve it. It’s just little old me, but dad, I’m just begging you, would you help me in this area”? I wouldn’t feel sorry for him, I would feel bad about myself. As a father, I would think, “What have I done wrong? My son comes to me so inferior, feeling unworthy, begging me for a little help”. It’s not my lack of love for my son, I’d give him the world. It’s his lack of knowing how much he is loved. Now, I’m happy to say my children don’t feel that way. They know how much they’re loved, and they’re not afraid to ask.
When our daughter Alexandra was 10 years old, she was going out to eat with her cousins, and they were about to go ice skating, and she came up to me in the den and said, “Dad, can I have $20 to go out to eat and go ice skating”? I said, “Sure, go back and get it off my bathroom counter where I keep my keys”. She gave me a kiss and said thank you. Then she turned and started walking toward the garage, the wrong way. I said, “Wait a minute, aren’t you going to go get the money”? She smiled and said, “I already got it”. She said, “I knew you would say, ‘Yes.'”
That made me feel good as a father. She knows how much I love her. She’s not living with an “I think” mentality. “I hope he loves me. If I perform good enough, he’ll love me”. She has no doubt, “My father loves me”. What if we felt that same way about our Heavenly Father? You want to make God smile? You want to make his day? Start approaching him like you know he loves you, you know he’s for you, you know he’s longing to be good to you. It doesn’t bring God any pleasure for us to go around insecure, unworthy, beating ourselves up for past mistakes. Shake that off and start going boldly to the throne.
She called, and you notice they’re not here. You know why Alexandra could have that boldness? She knows she’s the one I love. She knows she’s my prized possession. She knows I’ll go out of my way to be good to her. She’s my child. Now, I’ll be good to your child, I’ll be kind, loving, generous, but let’s be honest. If it’s between your child and my child, I’m going to choose my child. That’s my daughter, she’s my favorite.
That’s the way God feels about you. You’re his child. Can I tell you a secret? Don’t tell anyone, keep it confidential, you’re his favorite. You’re the one that he loves. I’ve heard it said God has no favorites. I think that’s wrong. God has all favorites. You’re his favorite, you’re his favorite, you’re his favorite, you’re his favorite.
God has the amazing ability to treat us all like we’re his favorite. He’s not like people, he doesn’t have to pick and choose, he has unlimited love. He doesn’t just show love, he doesn’t just express love, he is love. That’s not what he does, it’s who he is. When you start seeing yourself as his favorite, you’ll go to him with confidence, you’ll pray bold prayers, you’ll ask him for your dreams, you’ll believe for your health to turn around, you’ll expect new doors to open. Not because of who you are, but because of who your father is. You know he’ll go out of his way to be good to you.
I grew up with five siblings, and my sister April is the youngest. She always felt like she was the favorite of the family. The truth is my parents had more resources when she came along. My older brother Paul is 47 years older than April, I mean 12 years older than April, and from a young age, April started telling us all that she was our parent’s favorite.
Now, that never bothered me ’cause I knew she wasn’t, I was. But she’s been doing this so long, now when my mother sends us kids a group text, it lists our names at the top. Paul, Lisa, Tamra, Joel. Instead of April, it says favorite. I had my mother’s cell phone one time, under the contacts, she has April stored as favorite. Now, that’s not right.
I can imagine if God had a cell phone, you would be stored under favorite. Not Joseph Rodriguez, favorite Rodriguez, favorite Smith, favorite Edward, favorite Rebecca. We’re all his favorite. You’re the one that he loves. “Well, not me, Joel. You don’t know the mistakes I’ve made. I don’t know the past I’ve lived. When I clean myself up, I know God will love me a lot more”. Nothing you can do will make God love you anymore. You might as well believe you’re his favorite right now. Now, he may not be pleased with all your behavior, but that doesn’t change his love for you.
When we go around guilty, beating ourselves up, that doesn’t help you to do better. It pushes you down, causes you to struggle more. But when you receive God’s love and know, despite your shortcomings, he’s still proud of you, he still says you’re amazing, he still calls you a masterpiece, that’s what lifts your spirit. That’s what gives you the strength to do better and to break those chains that are holding you back.
Luke chapter 19, there’s the story of Zacchaeus. He was a tax collector, and back in those days, they were known for being dishonest, for cheating people. They were very disliked, even hated. Zacchaeus was the chief tax collector. He was especially despised, looked down on by everyone. Not just figuratively, but even physically he was very short, and one day, Jesus came passing through their town and word spread quickly.
Everyone went out to try to get a glimpse of Jesus, including Zacchaeus. But it was so crowded, so many throngs of people, Zacchaeus couldn’t see anything. He was too short. Rather than give up, he decided to climb up in a tree. He got in perfect position, had a great viewpoint. In a few minutes, Jesus came walking down the street. I could imagine Zacchaeus was in awe. He had heard how Jesus had healed the sick, opened blind eyes, cured the lepers. Now, Jesus was passing right in front of him, it was an amazing moment. Hundreds of people were trying to touch Jesus, get his attention.
All of the sudden, in the midst of the commotion, Jesus stopped. Everyone froze, thinking, “Why is he stopping”? They got quiet, “He’s going to say something”. Jesus turned and looked up in the tree. Time stopped for Zacchaeus. Every eye was focused on him. Zacchaeus knew he was hated, he knew he had cheated, done people wrong. He was waiting for Jesus to let him have it, but Jesus said, “Zacchaeus, come down from the tree. I want to go to your house and have dinner”.
At that moment, I believe Zacchaeus felt something that he had never felt. Something on the inside said, “Zacchaeus, you’re the one that he loves”. Out of all the people there that day, no doubt there were rabbis, elders in the synagogue, respected leaders. Jesus could’ve gone to dinner with any of them, but he was making this point. You don’t have to have it all together for God to love you. You don’t have to clean yourself up, then you can come down out of the tree, then you can go to dinner. If that was the case, none of us would have had a chance.
What’s interesting is the name Zacchaeus means pure one. I doubt if anyone in that crowd ever called him Zacchaeus. They probably called him fraud, crook, cheater. One version says they called him scum. Jesus could have looked up in the tree and said, “Hey you, come down. Hey, mister. Hey, sir”. Or “Somebody get that guy for me”. But on purpose, Jesus said, “Zacchaeus, pure one, come down. I want to go to your house for dinner”.
The religious leaders nearly passed out. They said, “Why would he go to dinner with such a notorious sinner”? We don’t see people the way God sees them. We look at their behavior, how perfectly they perform. God looks beyond all that. They saw a notorious sinner, God saw the one that he loved, and you may have made mistakes, like Zacchaeus you got off course, you know you’re not where you should be. But if Jesus came passing by today, he wouldn’t say, “Hey Joel, come on man, let’s go to lunch. You got that big church. Hey, sister do right, you hadn’t made a mistake in 33 years, I’m proud of you. Let’s go get something to eat”.
He would pass by all the people that looked like they have it together, he would come to you. You’re the one that he loves, and you may be up in the tree trying to hide, dealing with issues. Can I tell you we all have issues. God is saying, “Come down, pure one. Come down, forgiven child. Come down, redeemed daughter. Come down, favorite one”. Jesus’ point in choosing Zacchaeus over all the other, quote, good people was to let us know your performance doesn’t determine God’s love for you. “Well, Joel, if I can break this bad habit, if I can stop this addiction, I know he’ll love me a lot more”. No, he will be more pleased with your behavior, your life will go better, but that doesn’t affect God’s love for you. He’s calling you pure one right now.
Will you receive this love? Will you come down and go to dinner, so to speak? Or are you going to stay up in that tree and let condemning voices convince you that you’re all washed up? You have to shake that off and say it by faith, “Lord, I believe I’m the one you love. I believe despite my failures, despite my mistakes, you still have a great plan for my life”. 1 John 4 says, “This is real love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son as a sacrifice for our sins”. Real love is not our love for God, it’s God’s love for us, and when we try to perform to gain this love, the problem is we’ll never measure up. There will always be something we can’t do right, some reason we can’t feel good about ourselves. Why don’t you take the pressure off and receive real love, God’s love for you?
That’s what the lady had to do in John chapter 8. The religious leaders brought her to Jesus, she was caught in the act of adultery. They threw her at his feet, said, “The law says stone her. What do you say we should do”? Jesus said, “You that are without sin throw the first stone”. They all left from the oldest to the youngest. Jesus asked the woman, “Where are your accusers? Hasn’t anyone condemned you”? She said, “No man, Lord”. He said, “Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more”.
He didn’t say, “Go and sin no more, then I won’t condemn you. Change your ways, get your act together, quit giving into the temptation, then I’ll love you, then I’ll be for you”. Just the opposite. He said, “I don’t condemn you,” first. Before he talked about her behavior, before he addressed the issues, Jesus wanted to make sure she knew she was the one that he loved, and when she felt this real love, when she realized the one person that could’ve condemned her wouldn’t do it, I believe something happened on the inside. She walked out of there a changed woman.
But sometimes religion tells us, “Clean yourself up, then God will love you. Do right, perform correctly. If not, God won’t have anything to do with you”. That’s not real love, that’s conditional love. If you do good enough, if you measure up, then God will help you. Real love is not about your performance, what you do or don’t do. It’s about what God has already done. It’s not based on how much you love God, it’s based on how much God loves you.
When my brother Paul was a little boy, before any of us siblings were born, my parents would put him in his bed at night, and then they would go and get in their own bed. Their rooms were just a few feet apart, down a short hallway. My father would always say, “Goodnight, Paul,” and Paul would answer back, “Goodnight, daddy. Goodnight, mother”.
One night, for some reason, Paul was a little afraid. A couple minutes after they had said their good-nights, Paul said, “Daddy, are you still in there”? My father said, “Yes Paul, I’m still here”. It was quiet for a few seconds, then Paul asked, “Daddy, is your face turned toward me”? My father said, “Yes Paul, my face is turned towards you”. Somehow, it made Paul feel better just knowing that his father’s face was turned toward him.
Can I tell you today your Heavenly Father’s face is turned towards you? You’re the one that he loves. You’re his favorite child. He’s not counting your mistakes against you, he’s calling you “Pure one”.
My challenge is receive this love. All through the day, “Lord, thank you that I’m the one you love. Thank you that your face is turned toward me”.
Remember, real love is not about your love for God, it’s recognizing the great love God has for you, and if you’ll do this, I believe and declare you’re going to live confident, secure, overcoming obstacles, rising higher, and becoming everything he’s created you to be in Jesus’ name.